/r/Showerthoughts

Showerthoughts

A subreddit to share anything that goes on in your head whilst in the shower.

View /r/Showerthoughts on Reddit.

Last updated 0 minutes ago.



4100+

Posts

98.0M+

Score

2.52M+

Comments

92%

Upvoted


Recent posts

Karma Comments Title
5,189 116 Depression isn’t feeling sad, its your garage door opener battery dying but the thought of replacing it is so overwhelmingly exhausting that you just stop parking in the garage.
20,201 461 Somebody once said "Money is never yours, its just your turn to spend it". Following that same logic, water is never yours, its just your turn to drink it.
34,156 1,135 Pablo Picasso died in 1973, but we treat him like some renaissance legend who died hundreds of years ago when in reality he was alive to watch movies like The Exorcist.
22,588 593 Queen Elizabeth has been alive for so long that the title “King of England” now sounds wrong somehow.
47,043 775 Using a laptop makes it look like you're doing work or something important while being on your phone looks the opposite
6,826 189 Whoever said “out of sight, out of mind” has never had a spider disappear in their bedroom
32,441 830 If ghosts are real, they’re honestly a bunch of pussies. Despite being immortal, they hide from us Almost 100% of the time which would indicate they fear us more than we fear them.
11,776 384 Almost nude is so much sexier than fully nude.
31,068 436 If you see Gordon Ramsey in the same restaurant as you, you either have great taste or horrible taste.
17,236 297 Surfing is the only moon powered sport.
44,371 1,086 Sleeping sucks. You take ages to finally fall asleep, you miss out on hours of your conscious life and when you wake up, your breath stinks, you look shit and you stink and need to clean yourself. But unlike earlier, when you couldn't get to sleep, now you don't want to get up.
18,621 724 Needing a morning cup of coffee is the most socially accepted form of chemical dependency.






Top posts from /r/Showerthoughts

Karma Comments Title
126,003 3,027 Everyone hates being sung happy birthday, and everyone hates singing happy birthday, so what the fuck are we doing here.
submitted 3 months, 2 weeks ago
124,897 3,244 Dads probably bond with dogs so much because, in our society, men don’t get shown a lot of affection but dogs give tons of affection regardless
submitted 2 months, 1 week ago
100,964 2,877 The biggest flex is using mobile data in your own home because the WiFi is being slow.
submitted 2 months, 3 weeks ago
100,305 2,341 There is probably at least one white guy, adopted and raised in China, who speaks English with a Chinese accent and strangers just assume he’s a total asshole
submitted 4 months, 1 week ago
96,667 915 Biting your tongue while eating is a perfect example of how you can still screw up, even with decades of experience.
submitted 4 weeks ago
93,385 847 Thermometers are speedometers for atoms
submitted 3 months, 2 weeks ago
91,409 3,841 The bans on vaping aren’t frustrating because vaping is safe or good. They’re frustrating because they demonstrate swift and decisive action can be taken, but never for the right thing.
submitted 3 weeks, 6 days ago
91,077 2,332 Smoking kills you, but the actual “act” of smoking is a very healthy practice - leave a stressful environment, go outside for five minutes and take deep breaths.
submitted 3 months ago
89,604 1,919 We give rude elderly people the benefit of the doubt because they've been through a lot, but there's a decent chance that old person has been an asshole their whole life.
submitted 3 weeks, 5 days ago
86,963 1,373 The older you get the more you appreciate the moments when nothing awful is currently happening to you.
submitted 1 month ago
86,474 1,739 The Porn sites in the Star Wars Universe must have sooooo many categories.
submitted 1 month, 4 weeks ago
85,279 972 Night before a day off is more satisfying than the actual day off.
submitted 3 months, 3 weeks ago
84,797 2,442 Nobody cares if their deodorant is 24 hour or 48 hour, they are still going to apply it once a day
submitted 1 month, 1 week ago
84,560 906 Wikipedia built the biggest modern information hub using nothing but nerds' need to correct each other.
submitted 2 weeks, 3 days ago
83,801 1,423 Maybe the Mayan world-ending prediction in 2012 was more of a suggestion
submitted 1 month, 1 week ago
83,733 1,277 If you drive over a pancake it looks more like a waffle, if you drive over a waffle it looks more like a pancake.
submitted 4 months, 1 week ago
82,006 4,351 Most people know so little that if they were transported 200 years into the past, they wouldn't be able to invent anything any quicker.
submitted 1 month ago
80,695 1,768 You never realize just how well you can impersonate yourself until you're struggling with depression.
submitted 1 month, 2 weeks ago
78,146 1,761 If your school lends textbooks, teachers seem perfectly content in using ones published in 1999. If your school sells textbooks, then last year’s editions are suddenly outdated, worthless pieces of trash.
submitted 2 months, 2 weeks ago
77,874 1,414 The weird, artsy, loner usually gets the girl in movies (instead of the jock) simply because many movies are written by weird, artsy, loners.
submitted 5 months ago
77,587 2,124 An onion is the bass player of food. You would probably not enjoy it solo, but you’d miss it if it wasn’t there.
submitted 1 month, 2 weeks ago
76,831 1,713 If holy water kills vampires, then putting holy water in a humidifier is making holy gas. You just made a gas chamber for vampires.
submitted 5 months ago
76,704 1,482 People are so amazed by the fact that every snowflake is different, but nobody cares that every potato is unique
submitted 2 months, 2 weeks ago
76,145 583 Humans must be a very confusing species to wild animals. One minute a human might be trying to kill them and the next minute another human is trying to help them. We are the least consistent predators on the planet.
submitted 3 months, 1 week ago
74,643 903 Waking up in the morning sometimes feels like resuming a shitty movie you decided to quit watching
submitted 1 month ago
73,923 2,252 Telemarketers have basically ruined the telephone as a tool for contacting people quickly because no one bothers to answer it anymore.
submitted 3 months, 1 week ago
73,796 2,825 If gasoline cars ever become obsolete, the reason behind calling the right pedal “the gas” might eventually become a fun fact
submitted 3 months ago
73,097 2,528 When cell phones were new, it was cool to have a fun or interesting ringtone. Today, if your phone isn’t permanently on silent mode you’re a scumbag
submitted 4 months, 2 weeks ago
73,043 859 The banana is no longer the food item that looks most phone-like. The pop tart is.
submitted 3 weeks, 3 days ago
72,791 1,402 Your salary is your company's monthly subscription fee of you.
submitted 2 months, 1 week ago
72,669 1,559 You know you’re getting old when your parents start disappointing you, instead of you disappointing them.
submitted 2 months ago
72,226 2,101 We feel safest at home despite being surrounded by ~240 volt wires, endless water resting at 80-120 PSI and explosive methane gas, all in pipes and wires which were installed who knows when, by a person who may or may not have ignored safety standards they felt were unnecessary at the time.
submitted 2 months, 3 weeks ago
72,064 1,022 Ducks are pretty much just all-terrain chickens
submitted 3 months, 3 weeks ago
71,960 578 Looking for a job is about convincing a bunch of Mr. Krabs that you're a Spongebob when you're actually a Patrick, until you slowly become Squidward.
submitted 1 month, 1 week ago
71,795 700 Babysitters are teenagers who behave like grown-ups so that grown-ups can go out and behave like teenagers.
submitted 3 months, 4 weeks ago
71,629 1,430 In 1920 kids thought "100 years from now, people must have flying cars!" but really, a massive worldwide network of data utilizing the processing power of billions of devices allowing complex communication across the globe is somehow more impressive.
submitted 2 months ago
71,427 1,381 200 years ago, people would never have guessed that humans in the future would communicate by silently tapping on glass
submitted 1 month, 1 week ago
70,865 2,743 It's ironic that most office jobs give their employees labor day off, but jobs that are actually physically labor intensive (construction, cooking etc) are hit or miss and usually don't
submitted 1 month, 2 weeks ago
70,759 990 We've reached an oddly secure place as a species when we're rooting for the number of tigers and lions in nature to increase.
submitted 2 months, 3 weeks ago
70,394 1,070 The most unrealistic thing about Spy movies is how clean the air ventilation system is!
submitted 2 months, 2 weeks ago
70,122 1,473 The man who invented Internet is 80 years old now. If you see him walk down the street, you’ll think he’s just another old dude who doesn’t know how to use Internet.
submitted 3 months, 3 weeks ago
69,728 957 Sucking on a hard candy until it completely dissolves without chewing it is an incredible feat of self control
submitted 1 month, 3 weeks ago
69,713 1,280 The guy who killed batman's parents saved tons of lives.
submitted 2 months, 2 weeks ago
69,227 1,064 As a kid a wiggling tooth is exciting. As an adult a wiggling tooth is terrifying.
submitted 1 month, 2 weeks ago
69,082 667 Your bed is 10x more comfortable when you're not supposed to be in it
submitted 2 months ago
68,889 1,090 Your tongue is useless at telling your finger which 2 teeth the food is stuck between
submitted 3 months, 1 week ago
68,838 1,106 The nicer the house, the harder to find the kitchen trash can.
submitted 3 months, 1 week ago
68,067 3,001 Few things are sadder than leaving the vet's with an empty pet carrier.
submitted 2 months, 2 weeks ago
67,842 1,782 In 100 years, just like the titanic, we’ll be so far removed from events in the past that we’ll get a romantic movie made about 9/11
submitted 2 months ago
67,558 1,788 There’s a stranger out there who probably has a memory that involves you in it that they think about from time to time.
submitted 2 months, 3 weeks ago